I See Purple Cheese! Oh, Wait! Hi, Rex!
by Suboshi's Fangirl
Summary: Just some phluph that I managed to type on a weekend. Simply cuz I stupid ^_^ Involves Rex/Weevil. What's the importance of a boy named Carson in this fic? Read on.


I SEE PURPLE CHEESE! Oh, Wait..Hi, Rex ^_^  
  
Rex sat up, his eyes glowing a very strange color. He glared into the darkness that was his room, the lights turned out at three in the morning. He heard footsteps. Suddenly, something pounced on his bed, knocking the wind out of Rex. Rex scrambled for his lamp, and turned it on. It was Weevil Underwood. "Hi!" Weevil squeaked. Rex narrowed his eyes. "Weevil." he said calmly. "Yea?" Weevil responded. Rex ahem- ed. "DON'T EVER DO THAT AGAIN!" he screeched. Weevil twitched and fell off of Rex's bed. "I missed ye, ya know." Weevil said, taking the thumbtacks out of his legs that he landed on when he fell. He glomped Rex. Rex glomped back. "I'm tired, dammit. Let me sleep." Rex growled. "Oh, you don't look happy to see me." Weevil said, pouting. "If you jump on my bed and scare the hell out of me, yer damn right!" Rex grumbled. "Well, then I'll leave you to your sleep." Weevil said, crawling in and going to sleep himself. In truth, Weevil was exhausted after a long flight from Florida. He went only to see an extensive bug museum, brimming with exhibits, books, and live specimens. He wanted to go back, but his heart was with Rex. Slowly but surely, Rex fell asleep, curled up close to Weevil.  
  
The morning after was what nearly killed poor Rex. He awoke to a sudden scream of 'SOMEONE BOUGHT PIXY STIX!', and knew right away it was a mistake to not hide the Pixy Stix from Weevil. Four seconds later, an extremely hyper Weevil came barging through Rex's door, took a flying leap and landed on poor Rexy's stomach. Rex immediately passed out, until Weevil screamed in his ear. "REXY BOUGHT PIXY STIX, YES HE DID!" Weevil screamed. "Must.you..really.." Rex said, in a pure state of shock. "I'ma make pancakes." Weevil stated, got off Rex (not without stepping on some 'other things' in the process.ouch) and ran out the door to the kitchen.  
  
A sudden scream of "BREKKFEZZT!" scared Rex into coming to the kitchen to eat. Weevil set down a plate of green toothpaste-looking mush in front of Rex and himself. Rex made a face at it. "This is a pancake?" Rex said, glaring at Weevil. "Well, we didn't have enough grass or dog drool to make pancakes, so I made bacon. Eat." Weevil said, consuming the glop, and stopping to twist his head 360 degrees every once in a while. Rex stared at the twitching mass of 'bacon', and poked it. It started to inch off his plate, then landed with a splat on the kitchen floor. "Almost forgot to tell you, Rex. Ya gotta stab it with your fork before you eat it. Then you wait for it to stop screaming before you actually eat it." Weevil stated, taking another bite of the satanic concoction. Rex picked up the mass of glop and neared the fork to it. It then grew eyes and stared at Rex, giving him the Chibi Eyes. Rex's eyes began to water. He calmly picked it up and placed it outside to set it free. "Rex, you let the bacon free." Weevil said. "I couldn't do it! It was too cute!" Rex said. Weevil rolled his eyes and got a disturbed glare from Rex as he ate the last bit of 'bacon'.  
  
Rex and Weevil were walking to the hospital where they knew Roba would be. Roba was in the hospital after he was shot by Joey when Joey was showing him his gun collection. Roba greeted them with a slight wave with his arm. His hand got shot off. He was going to get a replacement soon. "Roba! How are ya?" Weevil asked. Weevil dug in his pocket and pulled out more of the concoction from earlier. "I brought you some bacon!" he said. Roba stared at it. "I think I pulled something out of my nose that looked like that once." Roba said. Weevil set it on Roba's nightstand and let it crawl around the room for a while. "When are you getting your replacement hand?" Weevil asked. "Well, I'm getting it tomorrow. I can't wait." Roba said, grinning. This conversation was interrupted by a sudden scream. Rex was jumping around, screaming. "It's in my pants! It's in my pants!" he screeched. Weevil looked around. The 'bacon' was gone. There was a trail of slime leading up to where Rex's pant leg used to be, next to the chair that was now overturned. Weevil slammed Rex into the wall, and without thinking, stuffed his hand down Rex's pants to look for the runaway toothpaste breakfast. Roba, not having two hands to cover his eyes with, slammed his head into his knees and sat there for a while. Think of how the nurse must have thought when she walked in to see Weevil with his hand down Rex's pants, Rex sweating and panting, and Roba completely bent at the waist with his head between his legs.  
  
Toothpaste bacon ingredients: 10.00.Hand surgery, 1,000.00..seeing your patient's visitors nearly gettin' it on? Priceless.  
  
On the way out, Rex and Weevil encountered a couple with a newborn child. "Oh, can I see the baby?" Weevil asked. The couple nodded. Weevil unwrapped the blanket covering the baby's face and whimpered. "Reeeeex!" he whined. Rex rolled his eyes. "What now?" he said. "I want one." Weevil said. Rex's eyes widened. All of a sudden, Weevil clutched Rex's shirt and screamed, "REX! MAKE ME PREGNANT!" Rex blushed, then set Weevil's feet back on the ground. "Weevil, you're a guy. Guys don't get pregnant." he explained. "We can adopt, though." Weevil pouted and shrugged. "Rex, you head home. I've got work to do."  
  
When Weevil walked in, he had brought with him a 7-year- old boy. Rex nearly choked on a bagel. "WEEVIL! WHAT'S WITH THE KID!?" "I adopted him. He's ours now!" Weevil said, grinning an ear-to-ear grin. Rex's jaw dropped. "We can't take care of a kid! You'd kill it!" The kid cocked his head. "Who are you, Mr. Funny-Looking Man?" he asked Rex. "Yea, real sweet kid." Rex grumbled. "His name is Carson. Carson, dear, that's your daddy." Weevil said to the child. Carson clung to Rex's leg. "Daddy!" he said, smiling. Rex couldn't help but smile, too. "Oh, all right. We can keep him." Rex said, laughing as the child showed Rex a picture that he drew. It was supposed to be a dinosaur. Rex was really a wonder with kids, and now he'd get a chance to show it. "Oh, you drew that for me?" Rex said, smiling. Carson nodded. "Mommy told me you liked dinosaurs, so I drew a dinosaur." Rex shot a glance at Weevil. "Mommy?" he asked, confused. "Yes, Mommy. He calls me Mommy, and I don't really care. He's a really sweet child." Weevil said, handing Carson a toy bird. "The kid really loves birds. I think he'll fit in well. I like bugs, you like dinos, he likes birds. He draws them a lot, too." Rex smiled again. This was more than he'd ever smiled before. Rex knew his life would change rather soon. For the better.  
  
Rex walked into Domino City High school. It was nearly dismissal time, and he knew Weevil would be coming shortly. Rex was 24, out of school with a major in Paleontology. He loved the classes, and was sad when his schoolong was over. But now he had more time with Carson. Yugi and pals walked out of the building. "Rex? Is that you?" Yugi asked. "Yep." "So, you've got a kid now? Who's the lucky mom?" Joey asked. "Weevil." Everyone's jaws dropped. "Is that possible? How did you and Weevil have a kid?!" Tea asked. Rex ruffled Carson's red hair. "Adopted 'im. Me and Weevil live together, so we adopted a kid." Carson was staring at Tristan and giggling. "Daddy, is that a dinosaur?" he said, pointing to Tristan. "Rex blushed. "No, Carson. That's Tristan. Friend of the family." "Friend." Carson said, clinging to Tristan's leg. "He's sweet." Tea said, picking him up. Joey snatched him. "Dude! He's cool-lookin'!" Joey said. "Daddy said you took his Red-Eyes Black Dragon! Daddy wants it back!" Carson screamed at Joey, beating at his haed with his tiny fists.  
  
Joey handed him to a passing Mai, telling her it was Rex's. "Oh, Rex! He's so cute! I overheard the whole thing. You and Weevil adopted?" "Yep. Carson, that's Mai. Say hello!" Rex told Carson. "Daddy says you're pretty. Daddy says that if he wasn't with mommy, he woulda chosen you." Rex blushed beet- red. Mai laughed. "There's Rex for you. Oh, I think that's Weevil coming now." Mai said, walking off. Weevil rushed by, swept up Carson and spun around. "Hey! How's my little dude today?" he asked. "Daddy showed me nice people, and a living dinosaur!" Carson said, pointing to Tristan. "That's Tristan, sweetie. He's not a dinosaur, he's a person like you." Weevil said. "Am I gonna grow a spike on my head, too, daddy? I'm scared!" Carson squealed. Tristan sweatdropped. "And you wonder why I hate children. Mokuba is the only decent one."  
  
:Later that night, Rex pulled out the couch-bed for Carson to sleep on. "But I wanna sleep with Daddy and Mommy!" Carson pouted. Weevil and Rex glanced at each other, then shrugged. "I suppose we could postpone our 'activities' until tomorrow. We can let Yugi and everyone babysit. They'll understand the circumstances. Besides, Yugi loves kids." Rex said. Weevil kissed Rex on the cheek, then picked up Carson and led him to their room. "You can sleep with us, but only for tonight, got that?" Weevil said. Carson nodded. Soon, all three had fallen fast asleep. 


End file.
